From The Onion:
Former Republican presidential candidate Ron Paul has refused to endorse Sen. John McCain or Sen. Barack Obama, calling the race a charade and choosing instead to back four independent candidates. What do you think?
“All four? I wish he could be more specific as to how I can waste my vote.”
“That’s it, I’m taking down the Ron Paul sign from my neighbor’s lawn.”
“Are any of his endorsees good-looking ladies? ‘Cause those are the only candidates I care about anymore.”