Blogging this shit…

by | Jun 5, 2007 | Stress Blog | 18 comments

Romney: I refuse to answer. It was Saddam’s fault. He wouldn’t let the IAEA in. (Pure lie)

Giuliani: Iraq invasion “absolutely” right thing. Promises more wars to come. “Iran is not ten years away from nuclear weapons.”

McCain: NIE? Huh? The sanctions were up, we had to invade.

Brownback: NIE? Never heard of it. Let’s cut Iraq in three. Divide and Conquer, like the British.

Gilmore: I love war too. It’s okay if they didn’t read the NIE.

McCain: If surge doesn’t “work,” we’ll do it more. Maybe divide the place in three so as to precipitate genocide, Zarqawi will follow us home if we leave. Check note card for name of wounded vet again.

Tommy Thompson: Let new Iraqi government vote whether we should stay or not.

Duncan Hunter: I read the NIE, and I bought it. They’ll stand up, we’ll stand down.

Ron Paul: We should get out ASAP. (applause)

Huckabee: They’ll kill us all!!!

Tancredo: Invokes Franklin, takes Hillary’s line it’s the Iraqi’s fault.

Brownback: Yes, talk with Iran – a little at least. Then bomb them.

Hunter: Blames Iran for Iraq IEDs (lie). I will use Nukes to preemptively attack Iran – if “necessary.”

Giuliani: No options off the table. Nukes if necessary. Invokes fake terror threats of NJ and JFK.

Gilmore: Use nukes. “All options.”

Romney: “You don’t take options off the table.” How do we move Islam toward modernity? Bomb them.

Tancredo: Oh, no! Mexicans.

Rudy: Too much makeup.

Rudy: National ID card=freedom.

Romney: I have nice teeth, huh? Blah, blah, something, something.

McCain: My border fascism is too totalitarian enough.

Giuliani: We need a single unifying database!

Hunter: Fences.

Brownback: Huh? Nothing.

Thompson: Mexicans!

Paul: Stop subsidizing illegal immigration. Ever heard of economic incentives? Stop scapegoating immigrants.

Gilmore: These guys are pinkos.

T. Thompson: Fred Thompson has my same name.

Giuliani: Claims to have libertarian view on abortion.

Romney: Abort or not? Depends on the election.

Huckabee: creation/evolution, who cares?

Brownback: I believe in God too.

Wolf: Anyone who doesn’t believe in God raise your hand.

Romney: LDS ain’t no cult, yo. I will now be very vague about it.

Paul: Follow the constitution – it’s easier that way.

Giuliani: We need the state to save the sky from the people. Apollo sized govt project. God shuts off his mic again.

Romney: Republicans and oil companies? Sorry, I missed your question there.

McCain: Govt must subsidize new fuels.

Paul: Profits are good. Socialism for the rich is not. No subsidies for oil companies. Overthrew Mossedeq for the oil. Shouldn’t fight wars over oil.

Gilmore: More socialism for the rich.

Paul: Gays in the military: Leave the policy alone for now. Groups have no rights, individuals do. Everyone should be treated the same.

Huckabee, Romney, Giuliani, also say leave it alone.

Thompson: George Bush ought to go around giving lectures on honesty and integrity.

Brownback: Bush jr. would make a great ambassador.

Tancredo slams Bush for being a socialist.

Huckabee: Every Republican blew it but me.

Gilmore: Libby question? Duck! More protectionism.

Giuliani: would pardon Libby.

Romney: Would pardon Libby.

Brownback: Would pardon Libby.

Thompson – Invokes Clinton – would pardon. (the rest said no.)

Intermission—————-

Audience questions section:

Woman lost brother in the war – What you would do to end this war?

Hunter: Invokes El Salvador, says continue war till they stand up.

Brownback: They’ll stand up. We’ll give them federalism – as far as I know, no one there has a problem with that.

McCain: My emotions too lady. Must create a free Iraq or else.

Wife of soldier – What’s your great idea for how do give them a great democracy?

Paul: By leaving. That puts the incentive on them. Stop patrolling immediately. We should not wage aggressive war, like the neocons and Wilson, it doesn’t work.

Il Duce: They attacked us. I was there, you know. “We need to take on that responsibility of nation building.” We have to create a central plan to control their economy.

Woman: Can a fascist care about the environment too?

Gilmore: No. Did I mention national security?

Tancredo: Yeah.

Man: Why is medicine cheaper in Spain?

Il Duce: Question ducked, divorce insurance from employment. Free market case. Fascist for libertarianism? I don’t think so.

Hunter: Let insurance compete across state lines.

Email question: Let’s have communism, right?

Thompson: Nationalize health policy.

(They won’t let the doctor address this?)

Romney: Yes, I am a socialist. I admit it. I am the governor of Taxachusetts after all. Doublespeak. Government mandated “private” insurance.i.e. Fascism over Socialism.

Man: What is the most pressing moral issue and your solution?

Huckabee: abortion. womb to tomb care for all.

Duce: We must spread liberty with military force. Then we shall have peace.

Ron Paul: Preemptive War is the biggest threat. Nukes on the table?! We have to come to our senses about this! War only to defend our constitution, our liberty. We cannot change the world with war. (applause)

Brownback: abortion, denounces Giuliani.

Man —- Romney hypocrite on the Mexican issue. Denounce them, then run ads in Spanish.

Romney: Waaa.

Tancredo: Bilingual is scary.

McCain: Mexicans rule. Ever read the Vietnam wall?

Man—- How do you differ from Bush?

McCain: Spending. Was I there? Huh?

Giuliani: I would establish accountability in Washington. Heh.

Romney: Nothing.

Thompson: National health care – I want more of it.

Tancredo: Bush is a liberal.

Paul: Humble foreign policy, no nation building, no policing the world, 1 Trillion a year. That’s where the money’s going – to maintain our Empire.

….

Gilmore: yeah, yeah…

Huckabee: Less taxes, more borrowing? Mexicans!

Lady: What’s an American?

Tancredo: Cut your ties with the past! Too many Mexicans!!

Huckabee: Mexicans? Yes, but only doctors and engineers. They’ll be good Americans.

Il Duce: I want to be like Lincoln! (Only when he was saying nice stuff about freedom.)

McCain: Believe in liberty. That’s it. No fences.

Lady: I’m a moderate who ditched you.

Gilmore: Change then. “We understand the value of every person – as a taxpayer.”

Romney: I’m like Reagan: Strong military: More troops, Strong Families, Optimism! Nice teeth, right?

Giuliani: Democrats are sissies. Offensive economy: “Put everything in government.”

McCain: Radical Islam – invokes bullshit. Good and Evil. They want to kill us all! I will kill all of them! Titanic Struggle.

END—-

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